Thursday, July 22, 2010

Bikers Are Not Supposed To Dress Like Pam Anderson

So there I was three days before my ride, standing in my team sponsor's bike shop, wearing the jersey that dude talked me into ordering, shaking with anger and frustration because the waist of this supposed large jersey came just short of my belly button.  When I tried to zip this thing up past my small breast, it made me look like I had Pamela Anderson TATAS. While this jersey made me look smokin hot, by no means was this jersey acceptable for riding. I then tried on my Bellwether Shorts, first of all I woulda been better off wearing a maxi pad in place of my panel and the panel didn't even come up to my "girl parts",   CCCCCOOOOOMMMMEEEE OOOOOOONNNNN! It took everything in me to not start crying in frustration. So I calmly got my shit together climbed into my car and that is where I completed my tantrum.

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Mountain Bike Chicks WTF!


Really? I stumbled across this sight while trying to find more female riders apparently these chicks a mountain bikers! This pic in particular caught my eye, take notice of her particular bike. First of all I'd pay to see anyone, male or female do a single track in the hills with that ridiculous beast. Second notice her legs and arms, No bruises or bramble cuts oh and those calves do not look like mountain bike calves. I guess the real reason for me posting this is that I wanna find real women that mountain bike not this cheap whack off materials for male mountain bikers. I've got questions dammit! Like what kinda seat do you use or do you wear flower crap or did you just say screw it and get a mans riding jersey, etc.....

Oh and to the jack ass who started the website "mtbgirls.com" girls don't mountain bike in their undies and if they did it would take three days worth of airbrushing to photo shop out the squito bites, thorn cuts, bruises and tree bark. So maybe change the name to "Hot Sex Goddesses on bicycles"

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Scenic Shore Bike Tour 2010 for Lymphoma and Leukemia

As I am typing I am sittin at my Yard sale for the 3rd weekend in a row, trying to raise money for this 150 mile bike tour for Blood Cancer and to get my bike set for the road. Damn this sport is bleeding me! I get a bike seat I hate it, I have to return it and pray my local bike shop has one that won't make my "lady parts" hurt before the ride next weekend! I also still need to find a pair of bike shorts that are around the 50.00 price range to help with the "lady part" issue. These riding pants that are like 250.00 Yes I do realize that they are worth it but my wallet won't allow it.

Friday, July 16, 2010

Gender Specific Bike Seats


I have to admit when I first started biking over a year ago I looked at some of the things that people needed for their bikes and I would think to myself, "that's silly"! One particular component was the gender specific bike seat. I seriously blushed when I saw these things I felt like I needed to put panties on these things. But during a forty mile ride I soon discovered how necessary these seats were after the tenth mile. While laying in bed that night with an ice pack on my very angry "girl", I started searching online for my very own Gender Specific Seat. Here's how it is going so far.

1)Original Seat (Diamond Back) OUCH!!!!! It's fine for a quick 10 mile off road ride when your not spending most of your time in the saddle.

2)Planet Bike: OUUUUUCH! 15 mile flat rd ride I did not know if "she" would recover. Seriously Planet Bike, who designed this? Obviously someone who has no Idea where a vagina is located. HINT: it's surely is not way back there! If a woman designed that I would hope they would know what part of the female genitals needs much protecting.

So far I've tried 2 I'll let you know how the rest go.